Friday, March 16, 2012

Writing 150 Research Draft- Affects War Imposes on Children

         Although one may consider that the most prevalent effects war has on children is the causality rates, when one divulges deeper into the lives of various children who have been affected by war, we can see that the trauma a child faces affects them a great deal psychologically, socially, and environmentally.       
When a majority of people think of immediate effects war causes the main thing that comes to mind is death: death of loved ones, soldiers, enemies, and civilians.  This is a very common affiliation with war, and it is true that death is a major part of war.  On the television and radio you hear of soldiers who are have given their life to serve.  You hear of bombs going off, and you hear of civilians dying.  So when some people consider how war directly affects children, they think of how many children are dying as well.  Many people think of suicide bombings, land mines, or other ploys some countries use to get ahead in the war. This is one way children die.  But children also die alongside of adults and the elderly as violence breaks out. Sadly, war is killing many people and children. 
According to the United Nations Children Fund “more than 1.5 million children have died as a result of violence between the years 1990-2003”(Wexler ie.) During Rwanda’s civil war over “300,000 children were brutally killed over a 90-day period” (Wexler ie).  These startling numbers are not uncommon.  These are real statistics and hundreds of thousands of children are dying all over the world because of various wars and violence.  Therefore people are not mistaken to assume a huge affect war has on children is associated with their death.  However, the war affects children more than just by death.  There are so many other factors that are not always considered. 
An obvious way children are affected by war, is the loss of parents or caregivers.  If a child loses their family they must leave their homes.  Between 1985-1995 “12 million children have been displaced from their homes”(Wexler ie.) Children are than either put into foster homes, orphanages, relatives homes, live on their own, or perhaps they join the war and become a soldier.  This poses huge problems for children at various ages.  They no longer have a parent who is there caring and providing essential needs.  This causes a chain reaction of events. 
Children then are more susceptible to malnutrition, lack of love and nurture, and the lack of good influences.  These are all valid problems that are not always answered. Wexler explains that “loss of parents and the absence of social inhibition together with physical insecurity and hunger many lead children and adolescents to prostitution, crime, and social violence.”  When children are young, experiences they have affect them for the rest of their lives.  Children are still at a “vulnerable” age and their experiences affect their perspective of the world immensely. These children’s whole lives could be altered to a new course all because they may have lost someone who was a good influence, or because they are filled with anger and hatred.  Not to mention the grief and loss these children will feel from losing loved ones. These negative effects change these children’s whole perspective of the world: making it very likely that these children will begin to make decisions that are illegal, violent, and self demeaning.  There is no easy alternative to this situation.
Even if both/one of the parents survive doesn’t mean the child will be safe.  War causes people to act in all sorts of ways.  Sometimes the war affects parents so negatively their parental responsibilities are no longer regarded.  The need to survive takes over. In fact Wexler stated “natural instincts such as parent’s desire to protect their children diminish.”  There have been reports that show parents selling their children as soldiers or suicide bombers.  Therefore these children are still susceptible to entering into a lifestyle full of hate, and violence.  Just because the child still has a parent that has survived, doesn’t mean the parent will be a good influence, or will be trying to protect them from a sad life style war creates.



7 comments:

  1. I like your usage of the statistic, and I think you'll be able to connect faces to these statistics making your point more influential. I'm not sure if you are going more formal/informal but just be careful with the usage of we, or you, depending on what you were going for. And I don't know if you thought about topic headings, or having headings in general but I think it would help with organization, and provide the reader with even more understanding of your viewpoint. Overall great job! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Simply put, Very nice job! I feel like I could be reading it out of a textbook, a report, or on the United Nations Human Rights website. Thesis is rather flawless, addressing a common (mis)conception of war in the eyes of children and leading directly into your three main points.

    Edits: 1) While I like the added emphasis, one of these ("But children also die alongside of adults and the elderly as violence breaks out. Sadly, war is killing many people and children.") sentences seems redundant. Essentially in both you are saying that children die in conflicts.
    2) I believe the N in this quote “natural instincts such as parent’s desire to protect their children diminish.” should be capitalized? Correct?

    Side note: Your topic is super interesting. Remarkably sad, yet incredibly intriguing. Best of luck to you!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Nicely done. You have a great start! This is a good topic. You could really use pathos and imagery to capture the audience and make your point. Who doesn't think dying orphaned children are sad? Milk it as much as you can!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Really interesting topic and a great start. I agree with the previous comments, this paper has a lot of potential for personal connection with children who have been affected.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Wow, very interesting topic. I really enjoyed reading this. I think you have a strong thesis and good evidence and support to back it up. Sounds like you have a great start on this paper. good luck with the rest of it!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Great start! You have a really great and interesting topic! This is a really easy paper to read and you seem really into it. You have some great stats and your evidence is really strong so keep it up!

    ReplyDelete
  7. It seems pretty good so far. The only real issue I see with this is that there is no real connection back to the thesis. In the thesis, it sounds like the main points you are trying to make are about the psychological, social, and environmental effects that war has on children, but the first thing you start talking about is children dying in war. Then you go on to parents/caregivers dying in war, and then to parents going crazy. None of these is really obviously connected into the thesis, and none of them seem to be combined into one main subject. I agree with the first comment, that topic headings would be useful, but it in general it just doesn't seem to fit with the thesis too well. I can kind of see how the part about children dying in war relates as part of the opposing viewpoint, but everything else seems disconnected. Other than that, the points you make are really good, they just need to be connected in.

    ReplyDelete